Every day for 100 days I will do a check in on the basic things Im doing to get my weight back to where I want it and get strong enough to get into KiteBoarding!

Weight 238. Yup. Im up 2.6 pounds. We had a cheat meal last night. Im going to get into they why and the how and its going to get rather involved. A huge part of me wanted to straight up lie and kind of brush over it and just move on. But that’s not why we’re here is it.

“How you do anything, is how you do everything”

So im going to ramp up the vulnerability and just try to break it all down. How my favorite person and I are enablers for each other, and how we’ve gotten used to failing and giving in to our monkey minds. And how Im planning to change the story.

Not sure when I decided to find a new kiteboarding pic every day but I like it! Its like a rolling vision board! woop woop!

Ok so, day three and Ive already failed. Dropped the ball. Let everyone down. Let myself down. Let Babz down. Im terrible @ this and probably everything.

Ordinarily this is where Id quit and double down on the pizza and ice cream, but I’m done w that. Looking back on the above language its hard to miss how deflated and powerless it is, how much agency Im abdicating. And this is legit what it sounds like in my head if I let it have its way.

What had happened was…. Michele finishes a week of work and wants to get some junk food, and instead of being the stalwart backstop that Ive been working myself up to being this week I fold in 2.4 seconds. Why? Because she’s been stressed and working hard and deserves a treat, blah fucking blah. It was because I wanted pizza and ice cream and “doing something nice” for the love of my life is just the straw that breaks the camels back. Its entirely on me. It always has been and always must be. So… I lost the better part of a weeks worth of work in a single night. To be fair (letterkenney fans I know what’s going through your heads and I love you for it)…. to be FAAAIIIRRR…. The weight this morning is mostly food weight and water retention. A healthy day today should get me back close to my lows, but I want to overplay the narrative change. I want to do what I havent been doing and use this as an opportunity.

SO. Let’s math the shit out of this:

1 pound of fat = 3500 calories.

1 hour of boxing = 600 calories

1 pound of fat = 6(ish) hours of boxing

2.6 pounds gained since yesterday would = 16 hours of boxing.

The most I've done @ once so far is 11 minutes. lol. Its very good at making me feel old. The GOOD news is that with all the squats and dodges its only pissing my back off and not my knees!! *I started doing squats almost every day before I got the balance board knowing damn well I have to gain as much strength in my legs as possible before even contemplating kite boarding.

So. What would be the opposite of all that defeatist language I started with, that’s been dominating my head space while it runs on automatic for the last few months?

*ps, its worth writing this down, WHAT IF I DID THE OPPOSITE? Is a question I first really came to value after reading/listening to Tim Ferris 17 Questions That Changed My Life

Its ramping up to 2+ hours of boxing or equiv workouts a day for a week starting today. And if my back starts to tweak (more), worst case ramp down to walking the dogs.

Take the failure, map on its mathematical equivalent in calories, and

DO. THE. WORK.

One Week. 16 Hours of Work. Starting today.

  • 10 minutes boxing
  • Another 55 minutes of boxing!

Water Intake — not good

Balance Board — forgot

****

Hello! You’re still here???!! Cool.

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